


Triphile

by LanxBorealis



Series: Alternate Universes [6]
Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Anal Fisting, Begging, Being Walked In On, Bill Cipher Being Bill Cipher, Confessions, Dipper is literally attracted to triangles, Eye Sex, I guess?? sure, In Character Bill Cipher, Jealous Bill Cipher, Jealousy, Masturbation, More tags will be added as this cancerous sin grows, Non-Consensual Touching, Other, Paranoia, Paraphilias, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Public Masturbation, Triangle ABC is the sexiest thing about this fic probably, Triangle Bill Cipher, Triangle Paraphilia, Trigonometry, True Triangle Fucker AU, Voyeurism, Wet Dream, hat sex, im not kidding. not even just Bill I mean triangles in general, this is exactly what the previous tag sounds like, this was a mistake, yaoi hands
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-04
Updated: 2016-08-18
Packaged: 2018-06-06 06:45:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 15,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6743704
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LanxBorealis/pseuds/LanxBorealis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dipper just wants to sit back and enjoy his free time to himself.<br/>Too bad Bill is annoying and way too interested in "human procreation for fun."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. What is This?

**Author's Note:**

> I was originally gonna post this in my BillDip Drabbles and Oneshots but considering I plan on writing more of this eventually, here it is in all it's glory.  
> Note: A paraphilia is an abnormal sexual desire. 
> 
> Also not too sure about the title of this. I debated between that, "Trianglephile," or something more silly like "Damn, Look At Those Angles"  
> Idek anymore. If anyone has a better name tell me. 
> 
> Before anyone asks, yes Dipper is quite literally attracted to triangles.  
> This boy needs help.

Dipper had been looking forwards to trigonometry.

He had been looking forwards to it for a very long time, actually. He had always been one to be excited by the prospect of learning new things, especially if said things had to do with mathematics.

Numbers were simple. Numbers were easy. Numbers made sense. Not like people, not like emotions, not like all those other complicated things his sister seemed to be content to wrap herself in.

At least, that's what Dipper had thought before sitting down at his desk and cracking his trig book open for the first time.

Dipper was all too aware of the people around him, shuffling through notes as they listened to the teacher drone on and on about something or the other. The orchestra of pencils scratching against paper was monotonous and did nothing to distract the heat pooling in Dipper's gut from the sight of those three sides put together in his book in a simple diagram.

Three sides. One, two, three.

Numbers were supposed to be simple. They were supposed to be easy. They were not supposed to cause his cheeks to flush red, for his mind to short circuit, and for that all too familiar searing to scorch his insides.

A bead of sweat dripped down Dipper's forehead, landing right next to the picture of the triangle in his book.

Dipper shifted in his seat, glancing around. For once, he was grateful to be sitting in the back row and smashed into the corner.

The kids surrounding him weren't giving him a second look from when their original blank eyes had scanned him when sitting down. They continued to sketch away in their notebooks, some much more focused than others.

Good. No one was seeing his reddening face nor the tent slowly rising in his jeans.

He shifted again, forcing his eyes up to the ceiling. He struggled to focus on what his teacher was saying, but all he could hear through the blood rushing through his ears was the utterance of "triangle," which did the very opposite of helping his…current condition.

Dipper bit his bottom lip hard, but not hard enough to draw blood, and sighed shakily through his nose.

_You can do this, Dipper. You can do this. Thirty minutes left._

Dipper was unable to force his shoulders to relax. Feeling all his resolve crumble, he glanced down at his book again.

Three lines connected _point to point to point_ stared back at him.

Mocking him. Seducing him.

Dipper peered around nervously again and making sure everyone was still ignoring him, picked his hand up and with a trembling hand, placed the pad of his finger on the point labeled _A._

Dipper swallowed the moan bubbling in his chest. He gulped thickly, his other hand falling to his lap and he gasped softly at the feel of his erection pressed up against his hand through his jeans.

His eyes darted back up and Dipper nearly shrieked when he saw one of his peers shift in her seat. She didn't turn around to look at him, however, and just leaned her cheek against her hand boredly.

Dipper shook his head in relief and, very slowly, gripped his erection through his jeans, sliding his hand down. Dipper chewed on his bottom lip and returned his eyes back to his notes, paranoia gnawing in the back of his mind.

The uncertainty in his gut calmed as his sight was stolen by the triangle in his book, anxiety burning away at the wake of the growing inferno inside him.

Dipper mindlessly slid his hand back up his clothed cock as he dragged his finger from point _A_ to _B._

Dipper parted his lips, panting softly. The buzz of the air conditioner drowned out Dipper's small noises and the teen's hand on his crotch sped up as he dragged his finger from point _B_ to point _C._

He pumped himself harder and choked a little on the saliva bubbling up in the back of his throat. Without a single glance up to make sure no one was watching him, Dipper buried his face into his book, kissing the triangle wetly and huffing breathlessly as the heat in his stomach finally released.

Dipper let go of his softened cock, bracing his hand against his chair instead. His breath came in sharp pants through his nose. He laid on his book, limp, senses slowly trickling back into him.

Dipper glanced up through his bangs and nearly fell out of his seat at the sight of the girl in front of him staring at him with huge, suspicious and confounded eyes.

"Hey! Turn around!" Dipper snapped her in a breathless whisper-yell.

The girl looked taken aback by the croak of the brunet's voice. She shook her head, repulsed, and turned back around to focus her attention on the board.

Dipper sighed, moving to sit back up. Humiliation and horror swelled in his heart and right then and there, Dipper swore he could've melted right into the floor.

Oh god. Oh god. Oh fucking _god._

Dipper rubbed his still red face with his perspiring hands. He tried to glare down at the simple little shape in his book, only for the hard look to fall apart completely.

God. What was _wrong_ with him?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp I hope you guys enjoyed whatever the fuck that was. This is def not my best writing but well. It's about literal triangle fucking I think I get a pass.  
> This is gonna be a drabble series set in the same universe so don't expect chapters to really directly connect to one another okay.
> 
> Anyways, thanks for reading! Kudos and comment if you enjoyed!


	2. Dipper, Get Help

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think everyone wanted more of this.  
> Idk have fun.

Dipper groaned wetly, saliva dripping from the corners of his mouth as he gripped his dripping cock tightly. His knuckles were white from how hard he was gripping the edge of his burnished desk with his other hand and stood out as stark contrast against the reddening of the rest of his body as he trembled where he stood.

He was so so close. God, was he close.

Dipper stared unblinkingly at the book propped up against the wall, triangles of all shapes and sizes staring back at him. His eyes zeroed in on that first and arguably, his favorite triangle of this chapter, ABC.

His hips jerked hard against the edge of his desk, his red cock trembling as the underside rubbed against the cool wood. He moaned at the stimulation and moved his hand upwards from the base, giving another long and jerky stroke. His fingers teased his slit, rubbing back and forth against the leaking hole, smearing precum across his head.

"F-fuck. God. F-fuck," Dipper hissed through clenched teeth. His shoulders shook and his shirt clung to his sweating back. "C'mon, c'mon, c'mon!" He urged himself and yet, he was still hanging at the edge of what he knew to be an abyss of bliss.

And he was oh so ready to fall.

Dipper's hand slid from the edge of his desk, up across the face of the table. His thumb grazed the edge of the trig homework he had been struggling to complete, shaky triangles filling up the entire top half of the page.

Dipper squeaked softly in pain when he felt his testicles press against the edge of the desk.

Dipper growled in irritation, dropping his impossibly hard cock onto the table, moving to scoop the innocent looking book up in his arms. He pressed his wet lips over the previous dried wet spot on triangle ABC. The kiss was nothing but sloppy and messy and Dipper was barely able to restrain giving the sides making up the edges of the triangle a long, wet trace with the tip of his begging tongue. He moaned loudly into the pages of his textbook and trembled.

"Please, please please, please," Dipper gasped over and over again between more sloppy kisses. He pulled back, a swipe of his tongue breaking the trail of saliva that had connected his and triangle ABC together. Wrapping an arm around the textbook and awkwardly hugging it close to his torso, Dipper ignored the pleasurable sharp stings of the edges and corners of the cover digging into his flesh in favor of grabbing his swollen cock. He pumped himself hard and fast, stroking himself completely. The side of his fist pummeled his thin happy trail and his fingers nearly slipped off his soaked head. With one last cry, turning his eyes downwards to stare hard at the myriad of triangles littering his homework, Dipper came.

Dipper groaned as the hot coil in his belly released, pure euphoria clogging his mind. Muscles spent and trembling, Dipper dropped his book onto the floor, falling back into his desk chair. He slumped down low into his seat, his bare ass aching a little from how hard it was. He panted hard, his chest grasping for any morsels of oxygen it could claim as Dipper snorted.

Dipper closed his eyes briefly, tense shoulders falling. His ears rang, the white-noise of how hard he had managed to come still screaming in his ears. He sighed, exhausted, and rubbed his messy hands over his face, pulling down his cheeks as he let his hands fall back into his lap. Shaking his sweaty fringe out of his scarlet face, Dipper slowly opened his eyes again, greeted by the sight of his wet but soft cock.

"Fuck," Dipper mumbled under his breath. He reached to fumble for the box of tissues on his desk, only to draw back, completely repulsed as his hand hit wet paper. Dipper's head shot up and he stared at the face of his desk in horror, grabbing the sides of his head and tugging at his curls.

"No, no, no, no, no!" He repeated over and over, standing up and peering down at what had been his homework. All his work- almost two hours of it- was now drenched in his cum, the ink of his pen smeared and rendering his already unintelligible writing complete gibberish.

"Goddammit!" Dipper cursed. He kicked one of the legs of the table hard, only to fall back into his chair with a squeal of pain. He lifted his leg into his lap, caressing his stinging toes, and continued to stare down at the mess he had made in both horror and resignation.

Dipper sighed and proceeded to get the tissues he had been vying for before, wiping himself down. Pulling his crumpled pants back on from the floor, Dipper dug out an old grocery bag to deposit his ruined homework in to throw away.

He did not need anyone to happenstance across what he did here.

Cleaning up the face of the desk the best he could, dreading having to slip from his room for just long enough to grab a towel and go back to finish up, Dipper pushed in his chair, admiring his clean up briefly before sighing.

Dipper rubbed his temples slowly. Carefully, he bent down and plucked his fallen book from where he had dropped it.

Without looking at it, Dipper closed it and placed it on his cleaned desk.

Nothing out of the ordinary at all.

Without looking back at his desk, Dipper turned and proceeded to get into bed, putting his back to the room and curling up under the covers.

He could complete his math homework later. Right now, he needed rest.

Too busy trying to bury his face into his pillow and forget about what he had just done, Dipper did not see the single eye staring out at him from the triangle printed on the spine of his trigonometry book.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Technically, Bill was in this chapter so B)  
> What? It's obvious I ain't pulling a fast one on any of ya. 
> 
> Still no story to this but. Well. Whatever.
> 
> Anyways, also, if you have any ideas for chapters at all, leave it in the comments and I'll get to it eventually! Maybe! If I like it.
> 
> Anyays, comment and kudos if you liked and, as always, thanks for reading!


	3. Whoopsie Daisy, Didn't Mean to Scare You There

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A longer chapter than normal! Wow!

Dipper had to hand it to himself.

He had a problem.

Well, he _knew_ he had a problem for a while. A hot mess of a problem that consisted of saliva dripping down his chin, blood rushing south, and three delicious lines drawn together to make what he knew to be the most gorgeous and perfect shape in all of existence.

Dipper sighed, fingering the edges of the sleek paper of his textbook as he threw his head back. His short chestnut hair spilled across his pillows and he puffed his cheeks out. Pinching the bridge of his nose and blinking slowly, Dipper lifted his head back up. Rolling his shoulders back, he scooted up a little more, using his hand to balance the textbook resting against his knees better as he drew the blanket draped over his body tighter. Dipper bit his lip, looked right, looked left, before letting out another forlorn sigh and staring down at the obvious erection he had straining against his light blanket.

His fingers, which had been resting at the base of his dick, had never stopped their slow circular movements around his shaft.

"God. Fuck," Dipper said to himself. He shook his head again. "Fuck me. Fuck me right in the ass." Dipper looked up at Triangle ABC and moaned again, "Fuck me right up the ass." Dipper grunted, never tearing his gaze away from the slightly wrinkled paper depicting the three perfect sides.

Dipper huffed a shuddering breath through his nose, his chest heaving in small pants as his small, pink tongue darted out to lap at the saliva pooling on his bottom lip. Sweat trickled down the sides of his face, plastering his locks of hair to the soft contours of his face. He puffed out his cheeks and in one, fast motion slipped his hand up in pumped himself fully. His fingers danced around the head of his cock, sliding around the circumference of his head quickly with help of the precum already leaking out. He groaned lowly.

Dipper's eyes rolled back to Triangle ABC and he bit the inside of his cheek. Eyes darting to the door briefly, ears pricked for nearby sounds of his sister, Stan, or literally anyone else, Dipper took a deep breath.

"God. So- so fucking...Beautiful. Beautiful. _Beautiful_ you are beautiful," Dipper hissed between his clenched teeth. He wrapped his hand fully around his cock and pumped full and hard.

He was so close. So very beyond close it was driving him absolutely and completely _mad._

Dipper sucked in a single breath.

"Hey, Dipper, you in here?"

Dipper screamed when he heard the creaky door to his muggy room open up, Mabel not even bothering to knock as per usual before simply walking in.

Mabel threw her hands up as Dipper squirmed in his bed, yanking the covers on him up higher and snapping his knees and legs close fast. Dipper's dark copper eyes were huge as he stared up at Mabel, nothing but hysteria shining in each one.

"Dipper?" Mabel asked, tilting her head to the side in confusion. She blinked slowly, her eyes slowly darting around to assess what exactly she was seeing.

Dipper bit his lip and hoped beyond all hope Mabel's reign in childish innocence would save him from near certain humiliation.

"Um, what are you doing? And _why_ is it so hot in here?" She asked, fanning herself with her hand.

"It's the summer, what do you expect?" Dipper coughed out none too nicely, sliding down into his bed and burying himself deeper in his covers.

Mabel cocked a brow at him. "Wait, are you reading your _trig textbook?"_

Dipper flushed deeply. Before he could even begin to form a defense in his mind, Mabel leaned back, hold her stomach as she cackled.

"Oh my god! You are! You're such a _nerd_ oh my god!" Mabel wiped at the tears in her eyes away. "I cannot _believe-!"_

"Mabel! Go away!" Dipper yelled.

Mabel laughed and shook her head. "God, just- _god!"_ Without another discernible word, Mabel turned around and left, thankfully closing the door behind her this time.

Dipper groaned loudly and waiting a few seconds to make sure Mabel wasn't just going to run back, Dipper let his knees unlock. Closing his textbook and putting it over to the side, Dipper let his legs fall and straighten before him. He ran his fingers through his sweating fringe.

"I cannot- oh my god," Dipper groaned, his head falling back. Dipper pinched the bridge of his nose before glancing down at his lap, sighing wistfully at the missing sight of his erection.

"Stupid Mabel, interrupting my _time,"_ Dipper grouched, sitting back up. He crossed his legs and wiping his wet hand on his blanket, leaned into his hands as he stared at his trig textbook.

Dipper sighed.

"That was a close one," He said to no one.

Getting up, Dipper quickly looked over his covers and making sure nothing on them could condemn him to a life of humiliation with his family, went ahead and got dressed.

Sanitizing his hands before laying back down, Dipper hastily tucked his trig book back between the bed and his wall. Laying on his side, Dipper yawned as he stared at all the oblong grooves in the wood. They were like little eyes, all staring at him curious, almost _laughing_ in a way.

Then, one blinked.

Dipper nearly screeched and almost fell off the bed at the sight. Legs tangling in his blankets as he sat up, Dipper blinked slowly as he stared at the one eye-like shape nearly level with him when sitting up. There was a smaller groove within the larger one, making it look uncannily like a real human eye. Dipper gulped, blinked slowly, and shook his head. Gritting his teeth and steeling his nerves, Dipper leaned forwards and placed his palm flat against the fake eye.

Nothing happened.

Dipper chuckled to himself and laid back down.

Mabel hadn't been wrong in her assessment of his apparent paranoia.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading I guess I don't really know what to say about this.   
> I never did in the first place though but still.
> 
> Again kinda running out of ideas a little so if you have one, feel free to share and if I like it I'll incorporate it! 
> 
> Thanks for reading! Don't forget to kudos and comment if you liked this fresh bag of sin~


	4. Nothing Suspicious Here, Nope Not at All

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got more ideas thanks to various sources and I kinda more or less smashed some of those ideas into this one chapter so enjoy. 
> 
> Is this plot, you see? No. No it is not.

Dipper had known his summer in Gravity Falls would be complete and utter hell. 

His parents had thought that after such a long and grueling school year they both had, they deserved a break. After all, what was a better gift than the place they had spent previous summer’s at? The twin’s favorite place on Earth?

Dipper had to admit to himself, the gesture _was_ a kind one. He couldn’t remember a week Mabel hadn’t been crying over some boy or another. 

Likewise, he had no more trigonometry, the _only_ class he had nearly failed.

Dipper knew his parents were upset he hadn’t done better in the math class as well as the fact that they had to fork over one hundred dollars for his... _missing_ trig textbook.

The same ratty textbook that was currently sitting in his lap, propped up on his knees.

The mere thought of it brought sweat pooling on the back of his neck. 

Dipper groaned, running a hand through his hair, grateful Mabel had already gone off on a “Girls Day Out” and was gone. 

Dipper pushed the textbook off his lap, rubbing his eyes. His nose scrunched up at the wet spot that had gotten on his single thin blanket he had. 

Of course. 

Dipper supposed he should feel more disgusted by himself, more perturbed. Dipper supposed he should be on the internet, right now, looking for a good therapist. 

Too bad Gravity Falls was practically a dead zone when it came to both data and wifi. 

Dipper supposed it was all the magic in the air. 

Dipper groaned as he sat out of bed, running his fingers through his sweaty curls. He rubbed his face, feeling absolutely and positively disgusted with himself on multiple levels for multiple reasons. 

He knew the feeling would go away soon, however. As soon as the sweat dried and he was in a new change of clothes.

Standing up and popping his back, Dipper padded over to where his still unpacked suitcase was and retrieved a single red tee-shirt and some boxers, quickly pulling both on. Pulling on some socks as well, Dipper collected the blanket off his bed, rolling it up so the wet spot couldn’t be seen, and sighed through his nose. He trailed out the door and down the stairs.

Hopefully this time the washing machine would work. He and Mabel had been telling Stan for years it need to be replaced, along with the dryer. Of course, the old man had been hard set in his ways and clinging to the money he had, refused outright to do no such thing.

Dipper paused when he reached the bottom, blinking hard, and hoping that no one would cross his path. 

The shack, as Dipper had thought it would be, was an absolutely insufferable place to be. 

He tried to keep his head down, his eyes focused on the ground and not the many, _many_ triangular images teasing his peripherals.

Already heat was pooling under his skin, flushing his cheeks, and fraying his already worn nerves. For him, life under the shack had been heatwave of carnal desire after heatwave of carnal desire. He was like some bitch in heat, panting and wanting nothing but- but _something._

Dipper sighed through his nose and shook his head. He needed to focus. He needed to also get out of the house. He would much rather walk the woods and get scorched by the sun then stay in the shack and be constantly tortured by the triangles littered about. 

Dipper reached the small closet that made up the laundry room without much incident. Stan wasn’t to be seen and he was only a _little_ hard. 

That was a good sign. Kinda.

Dipper dropped his blanket on the ground as he measured out the right amount of soap to use and start the old machine up. He dumped his blanket into the washer, drizzled soap on it, then closed the machine quickly. It rattled and creaked ominously and Dipper hoped it wouldn’t decide today was the day to break down.

Dipper pressed his palm against his face. He was not ready to go back upstairs and fight against the urge to gaze upon all the triangular shapes decorating every corner. 

Still, while he waited, it was best he take a shower and get some jeans on. Much easier to hide... certain aspects of himself behind denim rather than cotton. 

Dipper stared hard at his feet, a few teasing trickles of sweat sliding down his face as he mounted the stairs and went back up to his room. His flesh would prickled with the heat and already he found his thoughts hi-jacked by the shape that always seemed to be there, dancing right behind his mind’s eye.

Dipper gritted his teeth and threw the door to his room open.

Looking up into the now colorless room, he screamed.

“Pine Tree, Pine Tree! Get ahold of yourself! I know I must look absolutely stunning to you, but ya gotta save your screams of PURE ADORATION for me till the end!” Bill laughed. 

Dipper pressed a hand over his now racing heart. His copper eyes were huge and his gut churned with a mixture of unpleasant feelings he didn’t even want to start naming. 

“B-B-Bill?” Dipper screeched, holding his head tightly between his hands.

Bill snapped cheerfully and leaned back in the air, crossing his small black arms behind his head. “Least you didn’t forget what my name is! Ya know, I thought you’d be more clever than this, Pine Tree. Guess I was wrong~” He practically sung. He straightened back up and started to float closer. 

“Don’t come closer!” Dipper panted. Sweat was pooling on his forehead and the back of his neck and the little clothing he was wearing was starting to confine him. He gulped, his skin flushed a bright red. As much as he _knew_ he should look away from the- the _triangular dream demon-_ he couldn’t.

God. God. _God._ There was something _seriously_ wrong with him.

“You got that right, my prickly friend,” Bill cackled. He blinked his great eye, squinting it as if he were grinning. “But that just makes this all the more fun, wouldn’t you say?”

“Get out of my head!” Dipper commanded.

Bill guffawed, pressing his hands against his surface as he tipped back. Dipper’s ears rang underneath the high-pitch of his voice.

“Why should I? I’ve been in there for _months_ now, you know! Don’t think I haven’t been keeping an EYE on you! Because I have and oh, Pine Tree. The things that run through your head...scandalous!” 

Dipper pressed his hands against his crotch as Bill’s eye traveled down to look at him. He pressed his head back as far into his shirt collar as he could while humiliation raked its deadly claws right through his stomach. 

“I- I wasn’t thinking about _you,”_ He choked out in his defense.

Bill rolled his eye. “Me, you, other _triangles-”_ Bill’s face- eye?- pinched up. “It hardly matters. I mean, I don’t want to _brag_ or anything, but I am quite sure I’m the most good-looking triangle out there in at _least_ the other zillions and gazillions of dimensions out there. Not my issue that you happen to have poor taste.”

Dipper blinked slowly. “Bill. Are you- are you wanting to _sleep_ with me?”

“Well now! There’s a synonym for sex that I haven’t heard you use yet! Usually you favor the word fu-”

“Wait! You’ve been watching me-” Dipper’s mouth dropped open in horror. “You’re been-!”

“I already TOLD you this! C’mon, Pine Tree I know your brain is addled by my all powerful and sexy presence, but we’re already moving to part five of this conversation and you’re stuck in part one! Chop chop get a move on!” 

Dipper shook his head and rubbed his temples with his fingers. 

“And there it is! The truth~” Bill laughed again, pointing at Dipper’s obvious erection. Dipper squeaked and quickly pressed his hands back over the area. He stared up at Bill, completely mortified. “Bill!” 

“Bah, I’m sure you can scream more interesting things than that,” Bill teased. 

Dipper growled. “Would you stop being an ass for just a second and tell me why the fuck you’re even here in the-”

“Hey look! You’re favorite word! Fuck!”

Dipper snarled. “Fuck you.”

“Oh, I know you want to~” 

Dipper shook his head and huffed through his nostrils. “What. Are. You. Doing. Here?” He enunciated. 

“I already told ya, or at least implied it surely! Man, you really aren’t good with other beings, are ya?”

Dipper glared. 

“You asked me if I wanted to sleep with ya, the answer is- I could help you out, if you want.” Bill’s eye squinted up into another devilish grin and he floated close to Dipper’s face.

_Much_ too close.

Dipper tried to step back, but his bedroom door kept him from getting farther away from the triangle. 

“Listen, I’m completely bored right now, I mean, waiting for things to happen isn’t as cracked up as it’s being and I mean. You humans, as pathetic as you are, have some _very_ interesting rituals. Rituals that you put on a pedestal and practically worship! I mean, your entire _society_ seems to revolve around sex and its appeal!”

“What are you getting at?”

Bill huffed and crossed his arms. “Do I really need to- ugh. Okay, to put it into terms your stupid and lust-filled mind can understand, I am bored, I am interested in you human’s concept of “procreation for pleasure,” and you are the only human I know and hate a little less than the others that I know can’t resist my devilish charms.” 

Dipper blinked. “So you do want to sleep with me.”

Bill threw his small hands into the air. “Gods... Yes! How many times do I have to-”

“No, No I heard you the first time. I’m just. In disbelief.”

Bill rolled his eyes and balanced his hands on his...angles.

Dipper gulped thickly and looked away. 

“So, Pine Tree. What do you say?” Bill asked. “I won’t even attach a deal to this one! All you gotta do is the one thing I know you _love_ doing.”

Dipper licked his lips with his dry tongue and glanced back up at the grinning dream demon. More heat was pooling in the pit of his gut and oh how _easy_ it would be to say _yes_ to _accept_ Bill’s offer to- to...

Dipper stared at Bill. Bill Cipher. Bill _fucking_ Cipher. 

The triangular dream demon of his childhood that had terrorized not only _him,_ but Mabel and the rest of his family and friends. 

Dipper pressed his lips into a thin line.

“No.”

“Why, I knew you would say- wait. No?” Bill’s eye was huge as he stared down at him.

Dipper grinned himself. Never before had he seen Bill so damn _flabbergasted._

Dipper bathed in the feeling.

“No,” He said again, a cheerful little lilt in the word. He pushed Bill away from him. “I am not sleeping with you. Fucking you. Whatever. I don’t care if you’re- you’re-” Dipper flushed brightly and practically whispered the word, “-a triangle. You’re evil and you _tortured_ me when I was younger! It’s a no.” "

_Tortured_ you? That wasn’t torture! I was building your character and look, it worked out well.”

Dipper snorted and rolled his eyes, stamping his foot. “Are you taking responsibility to making me _attracted_ to _triangles?”_

Bill scoffed. “Of course not! That freakishness is all on you, Pine Tree. You’re really not right in the head, are you?”

Dipper gave Bill a hard glare. The triangle floated away from him.

“Fine, fine! I can see when I am not wanted. But trust me, Dipper Pines-” Dipper shivered at the sound of his name being barked by Bill’s voice, “-You will submit to me, one way or another.”

“Let me just go take a shower,” Dipper complained.

Bill cackled again. “You need one. You smell like sweat and cum.”

Dipper’s flush crawled up to his ears.

“Anyways, don’t think this is the last you’ll see of me, Pine Tree. I’ll be back! And remember- reality is an illusion the universe is a hologram BUY GOLD BYEEE!"

Dipper nearly fell back against the door as Bill disappeared in a bright flash. Color melted back into the world around him.

Dipper’s heart was still racing as he picked himself back up and his hands shook. He glared down at his erection. “How are you still here?” He said to it before slapping his hands over his face. “I just talked to my dick. Oh my god.”

Dipper ran his hands down his face, stretching his bottom lip down. He sighed loudly. 

“I’m going to shower,” He stated firmly to no one. He glanced back down at his erection. “A _cold_ one.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I actually got the rest of this thing planned out! It's gonna be 10 chapters long.  
> Sorry for no real porn in this chapter, but the rest of the chapters in this fic do have porn so enjoy that I guess. 
> 
> Anyways, if you're enjoying(?) this please please PLEASE comment that would be really great.  
> Also! Leave a kudos if you haven't already. I won't tell anyone if you don't ;)
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	5. A Dream Demon Wants to Get in My Pants

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe I am still writing this.

Dipper groaned as he finally got to shuck his pants off. 

It had been weeks. _Weeks_ since he had some alone time all to himself. True and _honest_ alone time. No more Stan barging in at random intervals demanding some monotonous chore be done right then and there, no more Mabel dragging him off everywhere. 

Well, he didn’t mind the latter. He loved seeing his friends and exploring. At times though, all he really needed was some time to himself to jack off. 

Which was exactly his plan now. With Stan gone to get groceries and Mabel over at Grenda’s for the night, Dipper had the shack _all_ to himself. 

As much as Dipper _loved_ his trigonometry book, he had to admit, he was looking for at least a _little_ variety in the triangles he was seeing. He wasn’t picky between the three- scalene, equilateral, and isosceles- but still. He wanted _more._

So that’s how Dipper found himself up in the attic, next to the triangular shaped window, the small triangles curving the wood around him teasing his peripherals. His hands had already shoved his shorts down, boxers pulled back to display his hardening cock, and both hands were wrapped around his shaft, feeling up and down and once in awhile, teasing his own slit with the pad of his thumb.

Dipper sighed through his nose. It was almost…peaceful. Well, _peaceful_ probably wasn’t the right word. Relaxing would be better. Just laying, all alone, listening to his own heart pumping hard and steady in his chest, his blood rushing through his ears, and nothing but triangles spotting his vision as heat pooled in the pit of his gut. His muscles were already tensing as he sped up the movement of his hand and small gasps escaped him. 

Dipper’s cheeks puffed out and a whine built in the back of his throat. He rubbed the pad of his thumb across his slit, smearing his leaking precum. He gasped, back arching, and moaned lowly when he came hard into his hands. His shoulders and arms shook at the intensity at which his muscles were clenched and Dipper fell back with a content sigh. 

“Heya, Pine Tree! Finished already?”

Dipper screamed at the sound of Bill’s voice as the world drained of color around him. He practically fell out of his sear near the window, catching himself on his knees at the last second. He used his hands to try and attempt to cover himself up while at the same time yanking his boxers back up onto his hips. He growled under his breath lowly and shot a hard glare at the triangle floating above him. Despite not having a mouth, Dipper was well aware of the shit-eating grin Bill had. 

“What the fuck are you doing here? I thought I told you to go away!” Dipper snapped, pulling his pants on fully. He climbed to his feet and crossed his arms, glaring up at Bill. 

Bill laughed, pressing his small black hands against his front and floating a few inches back. 

“I told ya I would be back!” Bill said, staring down at Dipper unblinkingly. “What, did you not believe me? For shame!”

Dipper groaned and rubbed his face with his hands. He ran his sticky fingers through his hair, causing it to stick up in different directions. Dipper scrunched his nose up, but didn’t say anything as he tried to force his heart back down into his chest. He didn’t directly look at Bill, instead, staring past him to the right when he went to address him again. 

“Jesus Christ… Seriously? I already told you, I’m not going to fuck you!”

Bill huffed, crossing his arms. “Straight to the point, I see,” He grumbled. “I didn’t even say anything!”

“Why else would you be here?”

Bill snapped and pointed at Dipper. “Good point.” Bill’s eye squinted up into a grin as he touched one of his points. 

“Aaaand he says puns. Great. Now, if you’re done, get out!”

“Oh, but I am just getting started! C’mon Pine Tree~” Bill sang. He floated next to Dipper, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. He rubbed his arm as he did his best to whisper into Dipper’s ear.

Bill Cipher did not know the meaning of the word “whisper” however, and he more or less yelled in the same, obnoxious way he always did. 

“I even let ya finish! So, what do you say? I know you’re already up for another round.” Bill reached down and palmed Dipper through his shorts, squeezing his hardening cock playfully. 

Dipper yelped and shoved the triangle away. “Hey!” 

Bill straightened himself up in midair and crossed his arms. “C’mon, Pine Tree! Stop being so DIFFICULT!”

“I’m not being difficult, you are being pushy! Now go away!” 

“No can do! I’m staying till you tell me ‘yes!’” 

Dipper frowned hard at Bill. “That is never going to happen. Just accept that I don’t want to fuck you!” Dipper glanced at Bill for half a second, licked his lips, and turned away again.

Bill chortled. “Says the guy who can’t even look at me fully.” 

Dipper wrapped his arms around himself and glared at the wall. “I am not going to have sex with you. Go away,” He stated more firmly this time. 

Bill sighed and dropped his arms, rolling his eyes. “Fine, fine! You’re so boring, Pine Tree. Well, whatever. It doesn’t matter. Obviously nothing I say will convince you, will it?”

Dipper shook his head back and forth. He still didn’t look at Bill.

Bill snorted. “I’ll let you go this time. Next time, you won’t be able to turn me down! I promise you that and let me tell you, demon promises are serious things!”

“You just made that up,” Dipper snapped. His eyes flickered over to Bill and he blushed lightly before looking away. 

“Did I?” Bill chuckled. Before Dipper could answer, color bled back into the world and he was gone.

Dipper stood stone still for a handful more seconds, listening hard to his own heart slam hard into his chest. Huffing through his nose, he strode over to the door.

Time to go look up what a “demon promise” was. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow another chapter how great! You are probably getting impatient for the BillDip to rear its ugly head.  
> Just wait now. We got 5 chapters left! 
> 
> Anyways, thanks for reading I guess. Please comment and kudos if you're getting some form of enjoyment out of this story! They make my day~


	6. “Sweet Dreams are Made of this, Who Am I to Disagree?” Well, Dipper Apparently

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Revenge of the stupid chapter names
> 
> Look it's the next chapter wow

Dipper moaned, barely able to see the golden glow behind him as he leaned into a hard but warm surface. Eyelashes brushed his shoulders and the demon’s black hands, which had been on his sides, slowly traveled down to where exactly he needed them. Dipper arched into the small hands, which were smooth and even warmer than the triangular body he could feel pressed against him. 

The hands stopped briefly at his nipples, rubbing and tweaking them till they were both hard and prominent before continuing their long journey downwards. 

Dipper moaned, nearly breathless as those hands finally reached the hem of his boxers. His erection was strained and the demon behind him, instead of directly diving his hands under, instead took the time to rub over his clothed shaft, a slow pump all the way up to the head of his cock. Dipper whimpered, a wet spot already forming where his cock was leaking.

He was already so _so_ close... 

The demon’s hands went back to the hem of his boxers, teasing Dipper’s sensitive flesh with the tips of his searing fingers. Dipper pressed back harder into the demon’s immaculate shape, yet thrust his hips up and forwards for more friction.

“Please...” Dipper moaned. 

“Please what, Pine Tree?”

Dipper’s eyes flew open, his sleep and his dream shattered by an all too familiar high-pitched voice. His hands flew from where they were in his boxers and he sat up sharply, nearly wrenching his back in the process. He pressed his knees together and glared up at the triangle floating above him, staring down at him with an almost curious look.

Dipper sighed, grateful for the nth time that Mabel and him no longer shared a room. 

“What the hell are _you_ doing here?” Dipper snapped as anger dripped back into his veins. He blinked his eyes open wide and pulled his blankets up over himself more. His anger masking the arousal still flooding his veins, Dipper glared hard at Bill, waiting for an answer. 

Bill had the gall to _laugh_ at him, pressing his hands against his front and leaning back in the air, small legs kicking. “I told you next time I wouldn’t let you finish! I don’t know why you don’t believe me when I tell you things, kid. It’s not like I _lie-”_

“Yes you do lie!” Dipper snapped. “Demon promises aren’t a thing!”

Bill laughed louder. “Sure they are! I’m a demon, and I promised!” 

Dipper’s face burned red and he shook his head, letting his sweaty fringe fall back into his face. “Just get out of here! I’m _trying_ to _sleep.”_

“That right there-” Bill pointed at him, “-did not look like sleep.” 

Dipper growled under his breath. “Leave.”  

“Oh, come on kid! Don’t think I don’t know what _exactly_ you were dreaming, I am a-”

“Oh so _you_ made me have that dream? What the fuck! I’m pretty sure that’s- that’s _rape_ in-”

Bill snapped his fingers and Dipper’s mouth, quite literally, zipped closed. “Calm down, my prickly friend! I did _not_ make you have that dream! That was all on you!” Bill crossed his arms, his eyelid lowering and he looked away. “I may be a demon, but I’m not _that_ sort of monster. Yeesh. You really think that _low_ of me?”

Dipper refused to accept the ice prick of guilt stabbing his heart. “Yes,” He stated firmly. “Yes I do.”

Bill harrumphed and turned away. He seemed to think for a moment, before turning back to Dipper. 

“Anyways, if I _wanted_ to force you, don’t you think I’d have done that by now? C’mon, kid. Be reasonable. I know there’s a smidgen of gray matter in that lust-filled head of yours!” 

Dipper cocked an eyebrow at Bill, who was back to grinning. He quickly glanced away and pressed his knees together harder. 

“I am being reasonable! How many times have I told you now? I’m _not_ going to sleep with you!”

Bill pouted and crossed his arms. “That’s a lie and we both know it, Pine Tree! Least have _that_ courtesy. Like I was _saying,_ I know exactly what you were dreaming. Dream demon, remember? I know you want it. I know _I_ want it. So come on! Why be so difficult for something you desire?” 

“Because you are _you._ I already said this. It doesn’t matter what I dream, I don’t have control over those like I do when awake. I don’t care how much you beg or plead, Bill-”

Bill snorted. “I _don’t_ beg.”

Dipper cocked a brow. “Right...well, I do not _need_ you! I am perfectly happy with my book and everything else.” Dipper waved his arms in the air. “So go away!”

Bill sneered at Dipper, his golden glow flickering to a brief red. “Book this, book that! Triangle ABC, Triangle XYZ! Doesn’t matter to _you._ Heh. You got _no_ taste. Isosceles triangles, really? _Really?”_

Dipper’s eyes briefly flickered to Bill before looking away again. “Are you... _jealous?”_

Bill snorted loudly and turned, floating away. “Don’t be ridiculous! Me? Jealous? Of- of _pictures?_ Of course not! It’s not _my_ fault _you’re_ blind to the best choice!” Bill crossed his arms tight over himself. 

Dipper rubbed the back of his neck, unsure what exactly to say. A silence stretched between them.

“So...can I go back to sleep?” Dipper ventured. 

Bill snorted, throwing his arms up into the air. “Sure! Fine! I’m done with you anyways-” Bill’s eye migrated to the front of himself to the back. Dipper flinched.

“-For now, at least.” 

Before Dipper could respond to that, Bill was gone. Deep, long, and dark colors crept back upon the world and falling back onto his pillow, Dipper groaned at the sight of orange and pink already streaking the sky.

How did he even get into this mess?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm actually v surprised at how many of you guys are enjoying this dumb fic?? I feel like it gets dumber as it goes on but whatever.   
> We're over halfway done w this fic and Bill and Dipper still have not had sex.   
> This is still a BillDip fic don't you worry tho!
> 
> Anyways, thank you guys so much for reading! Comments and kudos are always appreciated!


	7. Put the Triangle in the Triangular-Shaped Hole

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don’t test me I can make even stupider chapter titles you dont want to mess with me

Dipper dragged his tongue across his bottom lip, just adding to the saliva dripping off his chin as he rocked his hips up into his own hand.

His trig book, propped up against the wall, stared back at him. Its pages were wrinkled from the amount of sloppy kisses he had given it over time, and yet the black shapes still were as straight and as clear as can be. Each were teasing him, tantalizing him with their perfection, and Dipper found himself already so, so beyond close to finishing. 

“Heya Pine Tree! You busy?”

Dipper screamed, nearly falling out of the chair of his desk. He let go of himself, slamming his hands hard against the face of his desk. 

“What the fuck?” Was all Dipper’s response was. His hands pawed at himself, stuffing his cock back into his pants. He winced, his eyes watering at his own rough treatment of himself, but didn’t let that fact deter him from glaring at Bill. 

“Again? Really?” Dipper complained, sinking back into his chair. “At this point, I’m just annoyed. That’s it. You’re never gonna listen to me, are you?”

Bill snorted, rolling his eye. “When did I ever listen to you in the first point?” He replied. He shot Dipper’s trig book again and flew over to it, closing it and slamming it onto the desk. He hovered over it, as if he were sitting on it, and stared hard at Dipper, as if daring him to try and move him.

Dipper rolled his own eyes and sat back in his chair. “Is your plan to just keep me from masturbating or- or annoy me till I agree to fuck you or something?”

Bill chortled at that, his form brightening. He stared hard at Dipper, who was looking up at the ceiling. 

“Something like that. Maybe~” He sung. 

Dipper glanced over at Bill, his flush deepened, and he glanced away. “And you’re not gonna leave me alone till we fuck, are you?” He continued.

“Mmm nope!” Bill laughed. 

Dipper groaned loudly and leaned his elbows on his knees, putting his head in his sticky hands. He tugged at his own hair, breathing in deeply before sighing out of his nostrils. He straightened back up and this time, stared hard at Bill, ignoring his own hot and flushed face. 

Dipper grimaced. How was he still so painfully hard? 

Bill snickered at his expression, slipping off his book and scooting closer, eye heavy-lidded. “Well, Pine Tree? What do you say?” 

Dipper stared hard at Bill. Equilateral triangle. Flat- only a few inches thick at most. His points were sharp and prominent. Dipper rolled his shoulders back.

“If I agree to your stupid demand, will you leave me alone?” He finally asked.

Bill’s eye squinted up into what Dipper knew to be his own version of a shit-eating grin. “If you want me to,” He said coolly, rubbing his hands together. 

Dipper groaned and ran his fingers through his hair, staring down at his obvious hard-on through his pants. “Fine,” He said. He could barely understand his own voice saying such strange words he had never thought he would ever actually utter. “Fine! I’ll fucking sleep with you, this _one_ time. But you better leave me alone afterward, got it?” 

Bill guffawed, pressing his small hands against his front and floating up a little into the air. “Fine! We can even make a deal-” Bill held out his hand, flickering blue flames consuming his small black fingers. 

Dipper stared hard at the flames, up at Bill, then back down at the proffered hand. “Okay. Deal,” He stated firmly, then reached out and shook Bill’s hand. 

Dipper moved to let go of Bill’s hand and pull back, but Bill grabbed his wrist, letting himself get pulled along with Dipper and landed in his lap.

Dipper hissed at the sudden, but light pressure against his cock. His eyes were as wide as saucers as he stared down at Bill in shock. 

Bill was a little heavier than he had expected, as well as warmer. His heat was already bleeding through Dipper’s thin clothes and Dipper had to bite back a small hiss at the sensation. 

“Glad you finally came to your senses!” Bill chirped happily. 

Dipper sighed slowly through his nose. “I’m going to regret this, aren’t I?” He said to himself.

“Probably,” Bill answered anyways.

Dipper huffed through his mouth and gave the triangle a look, who was still staring up at him. “Well?” Dipper bit out after a few more awkward beats.

“Well what? I’m waiting on you!” Bill cried out, flailing his arms about. 

Dipper grabbed Bill’s wrists none too gently in a single fist. “Okay, first of all, if this is gonna work you are gonna have to do what I say. Can you do that?”

Bill grumbled loudly, his form reddening. 

“Bill…” Dipper said in a warning. 

Bill snorted and Dipper _swore_ the triangular demon was pouting. “Fine! But don’t think I take orders, Pines.”

Dipper blinked slowly. Okay…” He trailed off awkwardly. He dropped Bill’s arms. “First of all, don’t flail your arms around.” 

“Say the magic word and I won’t.”

Dipper refrained from rolling his eyes again. “Please?”

“Not even close but I’m feelin’ nice so I’ll accept that.” 

Dipper gave another deep, long sigh. He stared at Bill again, cocking his head to the side. 

“Well?” Bill asked after a few seconds. He wiggled in Dipper’s lap, grinding down on him on accident. 

“Oh- fuck- I’ve never done this with another, well… sentient being!” Dipper snapped. “You know… fuck this.”

Dipper grabbed Bill’s sides harshly and picked him up a little, kissing him hard below his bow-tie.

Bill made a small sound of surprise, eye widening. He looked down at Dipper, whose shoulders had relaxed. He opened his mouth a little, licking across Bill’s form, and moaned softly. 

Bill found himself tangling his fingers in Dipper’s hair, keeping him in place, staring down at him undisturbed with intrigue. He held his thoughts inside him, not wanting Dipper to stop to snap at him. Dipper’s back slowly lost its tension as well and Bill found himself moving his hands from his head, lengthening his arms to instead stroke his hands down Dipper’s back. He moved his warm palms over Dipper’s spine and shoulder blades. He pressed the both of his palms where Dipper’s heart was, feeling it beat hard and fast for a few moments. 

“Ah~?” Bill found himself gasping as Dipper started to run his own hands down his sides. Bill jerked again, a louder and higher-pitched sound of pleasure escaping him when he felt Dipper pinch his bottom points. “P-Pine Tree!” 

Dipper ran his tongue across the front of Bill’s bricks again before jerking back at Bill’s cry. he looked at the demon, a single eyebrow raised in curiosity. Was that… a look of _shock_ gracing the demon’s front?

“What? What’s wrong?” Dipper asked. His voice was husky. “You want to stop?”

Bill scowled the best he could, slapping Dipper across the head. “Of course not! Continue with your weird licking ritual!”

Dipper didn’t respond to that. “If you shut up, I will.”

Bill pouted and pressed close to Dipper. Dipper, when Bill didn’t say anything, bent back down to continue kissing his front hard.

Bill shuddered, another soft noise escaping him when Dipper’s hands returned to running up and down his sides. His thumbs traced the bricks on his front while his middle fingers followed the same motions on his back. Bill felt as if his entire form was melting oh so slowly, a strange heat building up in his small form. His eye fell closed, small patterns of colors playing behind his eyelid. 

Dipper grunted and tugged Bill lower. “Rub against me,” Dipper gasped against Bill’s bricks. 

“S-say th-the m-magic w-word,” Bill panted softly, unable to level his own voice out.

“F-fuck you.”

“That’s it!” Bill started to lower his body.

“Wait,” Dipper said. Bill hissed when one of his hands left his body to instead free himself again.

A small, interested _ah_ escaped Bill as he felt something hard, moist, hot, and just plain _fleshy_ press against him and between his legs, as if searching for something. Bill shuddered, not entirely sure what he was supposed to be feeling. 

The demon glanced back down at Dipper, who was back to slobbering all over his front. Dipper seemed to be enjoying himself. 

Bill relaxed into Dipper’s grip on him again, focusing more on the hands which were back to moving up and down on his sides, tracing his bricks and once in a while, pinching his sides. Bill smirked to himself hearing incomprehensible chatter spill from Dipper’s lips against him, surely praising him. 

Bill couldn’t imagine what else he would be saying, in any case. 

Dipper’s cock smeared more precum against Bill’s lower side. Bill tried to focus more on the sensation of something so hard pressing against his side instead of the sticky, gross feeling coming with it. Closing his eye, another more breathless noise escaped Bill. The heat inside him seemed to be building even more.

Blue sparks teased the air around Bill. 

Bill felt as if he were about to explode and when Dipper pressed up into him hard, moaning loudly against his body, both hands moving to pinch Bill’s points for the last time, Bill did. 

Bill screamed loudly as his eye flung open, flames spewing forth. His entire form shuddered and flashed- gold, blue, black, and white. 

Dipper screeched in alarm, yanking away and shoving the triangle away from him. He hissed as the flesh on his palms bubbled and burned. He held his hands out, tears springing to his eyes. Despite this, Dipper found himself coming weakly, a few strings of cum spurting towards Bill, missing the demon entirely.

Bill sunk onto Dipper’s desk, fire still curling around him but dissipating into the air. He panted hard, his eyes blinking blearily. His hands pressed flat against the desk, holding himself up

Bill blinked rapidly, the flash of white that had swallowed his vision fading. 

“What the _fuck,”_ Dipper gasped. He tucked himself back into his pants again. He lapped at his chapped lips. “What the fuck was _that?”_

Bill blinked slowly, struggling to coordinate his spinning thoughts. “How- how am I supposed to know? I’ve never done th-that before!” Bill slowly started floating in the air again, shaking himself. His golden glow, which was weak, flickered but stay true. “Wow does- does it always feel- feel like that?”

Dipper grumbled himself, his face screwing up. “No, not really.”

Bill stared down at his hands. “I- I wanna do that again!”

“Hey! We had a deal! That was it,” Dipper snapped.

“So? Let’s make another one! C’mon, Pine Tree!”

“You almost killed me!”

“You say that like it’s something _new.”_

Dipper scowled and glared at Bill, crossing his arms tight across his chest. “No. Way,” He enunciated. 

“Oh, but come on! You enjoyed yourself~ I know you did! Besides-” Bill snapped his fingers, causing Dipper’s trig book to catch fire. “-what other choice do you have?” 

“Bill! No!” Dipper screamed, launching himself forwards at the triangle. Bill dodged Dipper’s flailing fists, which slammed down hard on his desk.

It was too late, however. His book was nothing more than charred ashes. 

“Fuck! Fucking-!” 

“Well?” Bill said smoothly, sidling up next to Dipper, who was hanging his head. “I know you were enjoying it up till… well… anyways, you should _really_ stop lying to me, Dipper Pines.”

Dipper flinched and stared up at Bill, who was grinning down at him. “Besides,” The demon started again. “That dirty ol’ book wasn’t _really_ satisfying you, was it? C’mon, you don’t have to play coy with me anymore, my prickly friend. _I KNOW.”_ Bill’s eye flashed blue.

Dipper didn’t stumble away from the demon, didn’t even flinch. He continued to stare up at Bill with the same look he had before- a little anger, a little annoyance, more frustration, all veiled thinly with a layer of nothing but pure lust. 

“…Fine,” Dipper finally said after a few beats. “Saturday. When Mabel is gone again. Be here after dinner exactly at 8:30. No earlier, no later!” He turned away quickly, cursing himself.

Bill chuckled and ruffled Dipper’s hair, making him scowl. “Glad to see you’re finally thinking with _this_ head, more or less. Probably less.” Bill offered another flaming hand at Dipper. “Deal.”

Dipper shook Bill’s hand quickly before pushing the triangle away from him. “Just get out of here.” 

With another sleazy laugh and a wink, Bill was gone and Dipper found himself back in his chair, picking his head up and opening his eyes to a colorful world. 

His trig book was still nothing but char.

Dipper hung his head in his hands, groaning loudly. “What the fuck have I just  _done?”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow they finally had sex  
> how many of you were thinking I would give Bill a triangle vag or smth? Nah man. He is a triangle he would not have that.   
> Anyways this is actually a lot worse morally than I had been expecting it to be but them's the brakes.  
> Plus I mean. If you're taking this story seriously... why.... 
> 
> anyways, thank you for reading! Comment and kudos if you enjoyed~


	8. Hat’s Off to you, Pine Tree, for Being So Damn Fuckable

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a mistake

When Dipper entered his room at 8:30 on the spot, colors drained from the world and a familiar and triangular shape was already sitting on the bed, waiting for him. 

Dipper cocked a brow, debating on whether to comment on Bill’s obvious eagerness. 

“Hey,” Dipper said awkwardly instead and winced. _Wow._

“Hey yourself,” Bill replied, staring hard at him. His eye was bright and thought Bill had no body to speak of, Dipper swore he saw tension in his limbs. Dipper cleared his throat and, very slowly, padded over to the bed and sat down next to Bill. So close to the demon, Dipper couldn’t help but swallow thickly, the memory of the last time they were still in the same room overcoming him. 

“I’m here and I’m ready like you said now what?” Bill asked impatiently. He twiddled his fingers together and continued to stare, unblinkingly, at Dipper. 

Dipper sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. “Well, we are not- not repeating last time.” If Dipper was being completely honest with himself, every warning siren he possessed in his body was going off right at that moment. 

What had he been _thinking_ last time? He almost died! 

The thought caused heat to already start pooling in the pit of his gut and Dipper groaned lowly. 

Mabel was right about seeing a therapist. Not for the paranoia thing that she always clambered on about, but _whatever_ the _fuck_ this was now. 

Bill pouted. “What do you mean by that?” He asked, crossing his arms tight over his front. 

“Well for one, I don’t want to be _killed,”_ Dipper said. 

Bill waved his hand dismissively. “Yeah, yeah, keep being boring why don’t you?”

Dipper rolled his eyes.

“Sooo... you got any ideas?” Bill proceeded to ask after a few beats, peering up at him. 

Dipper sighed through his nose and peered over at Bill again. He paused, his eyes tracing his angles down to his points, then traveling back up. His gaze roamed over his triangular shape and all the way up to the top of his hat. 

Dipper licked his lips, more heat pooling into his gut, and the faintest and foggiest of ideas began to form in his mind.

“How... opened minded are you to all this?” Dipper ventured, still staring up at Bill’s hat. 

Bill shrugged. “I’m up for anything.”

Dipper grinned. “Good.” Dipper tugged at his shirt, taking it off and tossing it to the side. “Hey, is it, um, possible for you to take your hat off?”

Bill cocked a brow. “Take... my hat... off?” Bill stared at him as Dipper unzipped his pants, his growing erection obvious through his boxers. “No,” Bill said. “It’s part of me.”

Dipper stopped his movements at that, his boxers pooled around his knees, his cock bobbing a little. He stared with wide eyes at Bill, mouth falling open slightly. “Part of-?” Dipper shook his head. “Than this will make this harder but I guess you’ll enjoy it more. Maybe.” Dipper shucked the rest of his pants off. 

Dipper crawled back onto the bed, motioning Bill to move himself so he could lay down more easily. He spread his legs out slightly, sighing at how free he felt. “Can you... feel things that touch your hat?”

Bill blinked slowly. “Yeah. Why?” 

“I wanna try something... new. Completely new, even for me. Last time I _kinda_ tried to do this it didn’t work out, but well...” Dipper shook his head. 

“What are you blabbering on about?” Bill asked, annoyed. 

Dipper shook his head. “Nothing, nothing. Okay...” Dipper reached over to his end table, taking his lube out. He paused when he opened the bottle. “You wanna do this instead? Get the... full experience?” 

Bill eyed the bottle being offered to him, eye quirked in skepticism. He took it tentatively. “Now what?” 

“Open it up and put some on your fingers.” 

Bill did just that. Though he didn’t have a face, Dipper could see he was a little more than perturbed and disgusted. 

“Now what?” Bill repeated, holding his hands out to Dipper. 

Dipper leaned back, baring himself to the demon. “Okay, now you need to prepare me using your fingers that are slicked up.” 

“This is weird. You humans are repulsive,” Bill said, though for once he sounded more curious than anything. He slipped a finger into Dipper. 

Dipper bit down on the small noise that had been building in the back of his throat. Instead, he just nodded, hips twitching. “You need to move your finger now. Actually, can you slip more in?”

Bill proceeded to do so. “What is this even supposed to do?” The demon grumbled. 

“You’ll see,” Dipper huffed. Bill’s hands were small. “Now, move your fingers in and out of me while also stretching me out.” 

“I would say that doesn’t sound real, but nothing is anyways!” Bill chirped as he did as Dipper said. Dipper sighed through his nose. After a few more moments of Bill mechanically moving his fingers in and out while pushing at his walls, Dipper wiggled his hips, bucking back. “Okay, okay just... put your hand in me.”

Bill snickered while doing so. “See, Pine Tree? You never stopped being my puppet.”

Dipper’s nose scrunched up at that. “Oh my god,” He said. His odd look was broken by a soft moan escaping him. “Okay, okay that’s enough,” He panted. “Now-”

“When are you gonna stop giving me orders?” Bill growled, removing his hand. He glared down at Dipper. “I’m the one who should be-!” 

“Once you know what you’re doing, I’ll stop!” Dipper snapped back. “Besides, you said you wanted to do this.” 

Bill grumbled and scooted closer to Dipper. “Now what?” He said lowly. 

Dipper rolled his eyes at Bill’s sudden grumpiness. “Okay... you know your hat? Just push that point into me.”

Bill’s eye nearly bugged out of his form. _“What?”_ He practically screeched. 

Dipper nodded. “C’mon! You said you wanted to do this! Besides, it’s only fair. It’ll be fun,” Dipper gasped. His cock was brushing against his stomach. 

“For _me_ or for _you,”_ Bill grumbled. 

“For the both of us. C’mon!” 

Bill rolled his eye but proceeded to level himself out, pressing his hands against the bed as he fit himself into Dipper. 

Dipper gasped at the sensation, tears pricking his eyes. The girth of Bill’s hat was more than it had appeared. His legs trembled and he huffed through his open mouth as sweat poured off him in buckets. His hands gripped the sheets tightly in his fists. “Okay, okay that’s enough,” Dipper gurgled. 

Bill paused, the brim of his hat flush against Dipper’s ass. “This is so uncomfortable,” He whined. 

“Just start moving,” Dipper commanded. 

“I don’t think so, Pine Tree! I don’t like how you’ve been ordering me around! So you know what-”

“Bill-!” 

“You can shut up and I will do what I want!” Bill’s arms wrapped around Dipper’s arching form and the demon straightened back up. Dipper let out both a cry of pleasure and pain as he slipped further down on the demon. His hands scrambled for purchase on the triangle’s body, which had nothing to really hold onto. His legs curled uncomfortably around the triangle’s body and Dipper prayed he wouldn’t get a Charley Horse in the odd position. “What the fuck, Bill?!” 

“This is a lot more interesting and fun now! I should stop listening to you so much!”

“Bill! Put me down!” Dipper screamed. “This is hurting me!” 

“Hold on, my piney friend. You’re panicking. You gotta calm down.” Bill rubbed Dipper’s sides, eliciting a soft moan from the man. Dipper shivered, blinking hard. Dipper watched as more hands burst from Bill’s form to help hold him up and keep him steady. 

Dipper sighed as Bill’s hands picked him up a little, relieving the burn inside him. He gulped, the slide feeling more pleasurable than painful, and Dipper swallowed another small noise. 

“O-okay... I- can you move me? Please?” Dipper begged, blinking hard.

Bill snickered at him and held him up for a few more torturous seconds. “Only if you say I’m the best,” Bill sung.

“You’re the best now please fucking move me!” Dipper said without hesitation. 

Bill snickered more and slowly lowered Dipper back onto his hat. He repeated the motions, Dipper’s hands curling into fists on his sides, rubbing at him. Bill made a soft noise at the touch and another, louder sound escaped him when he felt Dipper’s toes tease his other points. 

Small moans and groans crescendoed between the two as their motions spead up. Dipper arched into Bill’s hands, his fists loosening to instead grip hard at Bill’s sides, the sweat on his palms causing his hands to slip up and down Bill’s sides in an infinite need for support. Dipper’s toes continued to curl and loosen on Bill’s points and Bill found too many noises escaping him. 

“Aaa _aaaa,”_ Bill sighed, eye flickered.

Dipper started slammed his hips down in time with Bill’s motions, gasping at how full and stretched out he felt. His cock brushed against his own stomach more and he found himself reaching his edge faster than expected.

“Bill, I’m gonna-” Dipper started, only to arch back with a loud cry, Bill’s name dripping from his lips as cum splattered against his own stomach. 

Bill grunted. “If you stop touching me, I will gouge your eyes out and feed them to your sister,” Bill grunted, rubbing himself against Dipper. Blue flames built around Bill’s closed eye and as the demon let out one last scream, it opened. Flames burst out forwards again, this time nowhere close to touching Dipper. His entire form flickered with colors. He shuddered and his extra hands retracted from Dipper, Bill tipped backward, dumping Dipper back onto his bed and falling onto the mattress himself, panting hard and trembling with the wave of his orgasm. 

“Well,” Dipper gulped, licking his lips. “That was... was...”

“Good,” Bill finished for him, sitting up. He had landed between Dipper’s splayed legs. He tried to float back up found himself unable to have the energy to. 

Dipper peered at Bill between his knees. “Yeah. Something like that.”

Bill snorted at him before crawling forwards. Dipper jumped as he felt Bill lay on his chest, not looking at him. 

Dipper opened his mouth to say something but close it again. A small flush was still painted across his cheeks. Laying back, he gently laid his hand on Bill’s front. 

Bill didn’t move, the color around him didn’t change. 

Dipper closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so this happened. Can it get any worse? probably. 
> 
> Anyways! Comment and kudos if you liked whatever the fuck this was! Both are very appreciated!


	9. You Got Cum in My Eye!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My friend published a playlist for this fucking fic on 8tracks!! 
> 
> http://8tracks.com/nimphia/fucking-triangles

Dipper nearly groaned when all the color around him drained from the world. Mabel stilled, mid-sentence, her fork still pointing at him. Dipper glanced at Stan, then quickly looked away.

His grunkle had been in the middle of eating when he had frozen. Gross. 

Dipper shoved himself away from the dining room table, Standing up and nearly tripping over his own two left feet as he marched up the stairs. 

Bill was _really_ getting impatient if he couldn’t even wait till dinner was over. 

Dipper scowled to himself, reaching the top of the stairs, and turned towards his bedroom. 

Not only was dinner still going on, Mabel and Stan were _still_ in the house _awake._ Sure, it’s not like they could be walked in on, but Dipper liked to take his time cleaning up after their... activities. 

Mabel and Stan still being here just caused him more stress and paranoia than he needed in his life.

Dipper swung his door open. “Bill!” He called out into the black and white room. 

Bill whipped around from where he was observing Dipper’s desk. Dipper couldn’t quite read his expression. Ignoring the way his heart started to beat rapidly and the sweat already pooling on the back of his neck, Dipper slammed the door closed behind him and stormed into the room. 

“Heya, Pine Tree!” Bill greeted with a wave of his hand. 

“What the hell are you doing here?” Dipper snapped. “I’m still having dinner and Mabel and Stan are still here and, well, _awake!”_

Bill snorted loudly, rolling his eye. “I don’t care! I got bored and I thought I would pay my favorite stupid human a visit! You should feel grateful.” 

Dipper scoffed, crossing his arms.  _“Grateful?”_ Dipper shook his head. “Right, yeah. Can you go away? I’m kinda busy.”

“I don’t think so, Pine Tree! I’m bored and you are gonna remedy that.”

“I don’t have to do anything! We made a deal-” 

“Our deal was completed weeks ago. This is allll on you, Piney. Besides, you’re already getting excited at my presence!” Bill pointed down at the slight erection showing through Dipper’s shorts. 

Dipper flushed but made no move to cover up. “Well, I-” 

“And you can’t just go down to dinner all hot and bothered, now can you?” 

Dipper groaned and ran his fingers through his hair. “I cannot believe you’d-”

“You don’t even have to finish that sentence for both of us to know that’s a lie,” Bill said. 

Dipper groaned. “Fine. But you have to stay to help me clean up this time.” 

Bill rolled his eye. “I will do whatever I want.”

“Billll-!”

“Fine, fine!” Bill waved his hands towards Dipper, dismissing him. “Just. Never say my name like that again.”

“Deal,” Dipper said with a smirk. Stepping forwards, he grabbed Bill’s small wrist and tugged him closer. Bill slammed into Dipper’s lips as he kissed him. Dipper bared his teeth, his tongue slithering out from between his lips to caress Bill’s front. 

The sooner he got this over with and the sooner Bill left, the happier he would be. Surely. He was getting quite sick and tired of the excitement pooling in his chest and the way his hands were almost too gentle on Bill’s thin sides. 

Bill squirmed against Dipper, but eventually relaxed into his hold, leaning into Dipper’s chest. Bill hummed as he felt Dipper’s tongue dip into one of the grooves on his front, tracing one brick at a time and traveling across the expanse of his body. 

Dipper, still holding Bill, walked over to his bed and sat down, leaning back against his pillows and letting his legs splay before him. Bill sunk into Dipper’s lap. 

Bill snickered. Dipper was _already_ hard for him. Bill dropped a hand between them to stroke Dipper through his shorts, his hand starting at the tip, sliding down the shaft slowly to fondle Dipper’s testicles. 

Dipper made an odd, almost honking noise at Bill’s ministrations, but continued kissing him, his eyes screwed up tight. His kisses were less harsh and his lips were soft and almost gentle as they traveled up. Dipper went up to the right of Bill’s eye and finished his kisses with a single, soft, and finishing one on the demon’s forehead, right above his eye. 

Bill ignored the pink glow illuminating from his center and stared at Dipper’s heavy eyes through his own hooded lid. He rose a hand to pat Dipper’s rosy cheek. 

“You’re cute, kid. But let’s get this on the road already!” 

Dipper snorted and rolled his eyes. “Okay, okay. Get off me so I can take my clothes off then.” 

Bill hovered before Dipper, not blinking as he watched him sit up, stripping himself of his hat, shirt, shorts, and after a second’s hesitation, his underwear as well. His cock bobbed from its confines, not standing up completely yet, but already harder than it had been before under Bill’s hard gaze.

Dipper fidgeted under Bill, suddenly not able to look at the triangle directly.

His heart was already slamming against his ribs and somehow, Dipper felt almost... _nervous._

Dipper knew there was no reason to feel as if his nerves were fraying as he sat naked before Bill. Knew there was no reason to _not_ drink in the sight of the triangle above him. Knew there was not a single damn reason _to_ feel the way he was feeling- like some blushing virgin about to adventure into his first foray of sexual pleasure. 

Yet... 

Dipper shook his head and forced himself to look up at Bill. “I want to try something new this time around.” 

Bill cocked a brow and sat back down in Dipper’s lap, leaning against his cock. Dipper sighed through his nose. 

“Like what?”

“Well...” Dipper bit back the words _I want you to repay me for fucking my dinner up._ “I’m not completely sure. I mean its not like this is exactly vanilla anyways...” 

“What does orchid juice have to do with procreation for fun?” 

Dipper gave Bill an odd look. “I’m just going to ignore that question.” Dipper looked Bill up and down. His gaze lingered on his hat, but then traveled back down to the triangle’s bow tie. The weak trickles of an idea tickled the back of his mind and Dipper smirked. He leaned back fully. 

“Okay, I know. One second, let me get my lube.” Dipper reached to his end table and pulled out his bottle. He tossed it to Bill, who nearly dropped in three times before catching it. 

Bill popped the lid open and poured some into his small hands. “I’m guessing were are doing what we did last time?”

Dipper nodded. 

“You said you wanted to try something new, though.” 

Dipper sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “I did but this step always has to be done. Well, least in my opinion it does.”

Bill chose not to comment on that, instead scooting back and parting Dipper’s legs. He sat on Dipper’s bed and staring at the human’s entrance for half a second, proceeded to poke a single finger forwards, slipping it into Dipper. 

Dipper grunted softly. “Why are your hands so small...” He muttered more to himself than Bill. “Um, more?” Dipper asked, his hips already twitching.

Bill gifted Dipper what he wanted, slipping a second and even a third finger into him. Dipper squeaked, not expecting the third, and his body tensed up. He forced himself to relax, however, and smiled as Bill thrusted the three fingers inside him, widening him. 

A small cloud of silence settled between the two as Bill focused on the movement of his fingers. Dipper stared at the demon, at the way he stared at his own hand and work. Dipper gulped, the fluttering in his heart not subsiding. 

He wanted more of Bill. He wanted to feel Bill against him. 

“M- More...” Dipper huffed through his mouth.

Bill didn’t even look at him as he inserted his last finger. 

However, even with the extra movement and stimulation, Dipper found himself hungering even more from the demon. His hips twitched in response to Bill and he sat up a little. 

“Bill, please...” Dipper panted. 

“I don’t have anymore fingers unless you want me to-”

“Please don’t grow more fingers! Um, just... your entire hand? And the fingers on your other hand?”

Bill stared up at Dipper, just a bit flabbergasted. “That’s a lot.”

“Well! You know! Come on! Please?” 

“Only because you ask so _nicely.”_

Dipper’s back arched a little as Bill proceeded to slip his entire hand into Dipper. His other fingers and hand followed and soon, both his hands were inside Dipper. His fingers stroked against Dipper’s inner walls, his palms pressing down. 

“Bill-!” Dipper grunted. A scorching coil was tightening in the pit of Dipper’s stomach and yet, Dipper found himself not quite able to cut that tension. 

“What else do you want? You’re so needy.” 

“S- So are you... I don’t know... your hands are too small...” 

Bill scoffed. “My hands are as perfect as I am!”

Dipper’s eyes nearly bulged out of his skull as he felt something... growing inside him. Bill’s palms were wider, thicker, and the tips of his fingers were ghosting against Dipper’s prostate, teasing him to oblivion. 

Bill was growing his hands. 

Dipper collapsed back onto the bed, his hips thrusting up as sweat trickled down the sides of his face. He was beyond close. 

“Bill, please-!” Dipper begged. 

Bill chuckled lowly. “That’s right, Pine Tree. Beg for me.” Bill jabbed hard at Dipper’s prostate while pressing against his inner walls. 

Dipper found himself grasping his own cock tightly, pumping himself hard and fast only a couple of times before he arched off the bed again, coming hard with Bill’s name peeling from his lips in a scream. 

Bill paused his movements, staring down at Dipper. “Did you just-?” 

“Don’t- Don’t pull your hands out,” Dipper pleaded. He sat up on his forearms, his chest heaving. He wiped at his forehead with his clean hand, brushing his hair back. 

Bill paused. “Okay. Now what?” 

Dipper tilted his head to the side with thought. Reaching out, he tugged Bill closer. Bill elongated his arms to keep his hands in Dipper. Dipper kissed his front hard and rubbed a finger against his side. Bill shuddered. 

“Well... hmm... you don’t- don’t have any orifices, do you?” 

Bill laughed loudly at that. “You really are a nasty kid, aren’t ya Pine Tree?” 

Dipper pulled a face at Bill. 

Bill snickered. “Well... I guess I could...” Bill laughed louder to himself. “You really ready for weird, kid?”

“Please. I can handle anything you throw me!” 

Bill laughed even louder than before, causing Dipper’s ears to ring. Dipper rubbed his ears with a disgruntled look. 

“You know, I like your style.”

Dipper flushed deeply and looked away from Bill quickly. His heart had suddenly risen to lodge in his throat. Again. 

Dipper’s nose scrunched up as Bill grew another arm. Bill smirked and wiggled his fingers in Dipper’s face, causing him to laugh with slight uncertainty. 

“You ready for a magic trick?” Bill snickered. 

“Um... I guess?”

Bill turned his own hand towards himself, and plucked his own eye out with the tips of his fingers. 

Dipper yelped, his mouth falling open. All that was in Bill’s socket was a deep, dark, black hole. A shiver danced down Dipper’s spine. Bill’s hand hooked upwards over the both of them, like an angler fish’s light. 

Dipper turned his eyes skyward to look at Bill’s bare eye. His pupil was pinned on Dipper. 

“Well?” Bill asked smugly. 

Dipper flapped his mouth like a fish for a few seconds before snapping it shut. He breathed slowly through his nostrils, gathering himself before answering. 

“Not going to lie, I am disgusted but not completely surprised.” 

“Huh. Everyone is a critic. I’m losing my touch.”

Dipper laughed. “Why? Because I didn’t scream in horror and try to run away?”

“Well of course!” 

Dipper laughed louder at that and shook his head. “C’mon. You gotta know I’m better than that.” 

“You’re not better than anything.”

“Well, thanks.”

“So what was your idea, Pine Tree? You asked me about my orifices and here it is!” 

Dipper smirked and sat up fully, sitting on Bill’s enlarged hands. “I only have one question. How would you feel if I stuck my dick in there?” 

“I would say you are a ridiculous human!” Bill floated lower. “Let’s do it.” 

Dipper laughed cheerfully, his eyes squinting in mirth. He sat up on his knees and placed his hands on Bill’s sides. “Can you keep your hands inside me? Please?”

“Sure.” 

Dipper thanked him and gripped himself again. He sighed, focusing hard on Bill’s sharp edges and points as he pumped himself. He was hard again in no time. 

“Wait,” Dipper asked, the head of his cock pressed against the underside of Bill’s lower eyelid. “What will happen to my dick if I shove it in here?”

“I have no idea!” 

Dipper paused, looked at his cock, then back at Bill, then back at his cock. His lips twisted to the side in thought. He looked back at Bill, at his form, at the pink flush glowing within him. 

All Dipper could hear was his own heart slamming against his ribs, the pit of his gut bubbling in heat once more as he thrust his hips forwards, sheathing his cock in Bill’s black socket. 

Dipper’s back arched and a cry dripped from his lips. _Something_ was constricting pleasurably around his cock. Dipper shook his head, not having to force himself back into his own hunger as he stroked down Bill’s sides, causing the demon to moan as he rocked his hips forwards, sliding his cock in and out of Bill’s socket. 

Bill panted softly, heat building up inside him as Dipper played with his sides, sliding his fingers up and down and pinching his sides. He shuddered. How was he so close already? 

Dipper threw his head back in a wanton moan. Whatever was around his cock, it felt utterly _amazing._ Dipper found the sensation to be utterly incomparable to anything he had ever felt before. He was already at his edge. Sweat trickled down his back, and with one last loud cry, came hard. 

Dipper had no idea where his cum went. None dribbled down Bill as he fell back. Bill’s hands slipped out of his stretched entrance and Dipper stared at the ceiling, still seeing stars. 

Bill grunted himself and Dipper’s back hadn’t even hit his mattress when he came right behind him, flames curling in the air. His eye socket radiated a hot white light. Bill nearly dropped his eye.

As Bill’s socket faded back to black, Bill popped his eye back in and sunk down onto the bed. 

“Well, that was something,” Bill commented between pants. 

Dipper could only nod in agreement. 

The silence that descended upon the two as they caught up to themselves was broken by Bill. 

“Well. You gonna clean yourself up. You have to get back to dinner, don’t you?”

Dipper groaned and slowly sat up. “My hips are killing me and I am stretched beyond belief.” Still, he got up and picked up some of his dirty laundry to try and pat out some of his sweat. Grabbing the clothes he had stripped, he pulled everything he had been wearing back on. 

Dipper ran his hands through his hair and turned back to Bill, who was lazing on his bed. Dipper gulped and rubbed the back of his neck. “Um, how do I look?”

“Fucked,” Bill replied. 

“Thanks,” Dipper deadpanned. He groaned. “Walking hurts,” He muttered to himself. He sighed, trying to steady his heart. “Well, I guess I’ll go back downstairs.” 

Bill grunted in reply. 

“Please, um, don’t leave till I’m in my chair?” Dipper asked, wincing at his own voice. It had grown so small. His stomach was churning. 

“Yeah, yeah I know Pine Tree! I’m not stupid.”

Dipper chuckled. His stomach gurgled more and he felt as if a hole was opening in his heart. “Well... see you later?” He asked hopefully. 

“Yeah. I’ll see you later.”

Dipper smiled softly to himself and slowly made his way to the door. Giving Bill one last long look, he trailed out of the door and down the stairs.

Color bled back into the world as soon as Dipper’s sore ass was back in his chair. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly going into this the only thing I was thinking was "Bill's gotta have them yaoi hands" and yeah thats it  
> what's really sad however is that this is like. the second or third time i've written eye fucking. this will def be the last time however!!
> 
> Tbh i am super bored of this fic and want it done lmao so i will prob just wrap everything next chapter which will be an epilogue more than anything and will prob not contain any porn. just thought i would warn you guys so i dont get your hopes up and yall are disappointed.
> 
> This chapter turned out awful lmao I hate writer's block. Hope you guys liked it tho  
> Anyways! Thank you for reading!! Comment and kudos are appreciated!


	10. Well Fuck This

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the chapter name is what i actually said when writing this chapter tbh  
> also its really shitty??? like if you're happy with the ending of the last chapter and dont want a shit ending to ruin this fic for you than this chapter is skippable lmao

Dipper was slumped in his bed as he tucked his cock back into his pants. The wave of pleasure that had rushed through him was already starting to trickle away, leaving him completely and utterly dissatisfied. 

Dipper stared up at the triangle etching he had carved in his ceiling. No matter how much he stared at the simple shape, the embers in his belly were just that- weak sparks of something he knew could be greater, diminished by the torrent of thoughts concerning a certain demon that was not currently with him at the moment. 

His heart was slamming hard against his ribs at the mere thought of Bill. He hadn’t seen the demon for nearly a month and the longer time ticked on, the more antsy he felt. He- He _needed_ to see Bill. The stupid triangle, with his pretty shape and dumb jokes. 

Who wasn’t just made of hellfire and brimstone as he had thought of before.

Dipper ran his hand through his hair, turning on his side and sighing into his pillow. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to know what was going on.  

He may have been clueless, but even he knew what it felt like to have a heart-stopping cruel crush. 

Well, maybe even crush wasn’t the right word… maybe- maybe just…

Dipper shook his head. “He’s a fucking triangle. Pull yourself together, man!” Dipper shoved himself up and off the bed and started to pace. He felt as if his very soul was getting eaten up by the feelings bubbling inside him. 

Dipper could not pull himself together. He wasn’t so sure how his feelings popped up or even _when._

Sure, it was true that sex often bonded people together, making them closer and trust one another but… Bill was a _fucking_ triangle demon! He should not be feeling this way about his- his _obsession._ His _fetish._

Dipper shuddered at his own thoughts and rubbed his palms hard across his face. 

There was only one way to deal with this. He was not having another- another _Wendy_ fiasco, letting his feelings eat him alive and spit him out. 

He was going to end this before it could become a real problem. 

Dipper quickly went around his room, gathering what he knew he would need. He eyed the pink can of paint Mabel had left in his room when she had been decorating her own and plucked it up. After a few more seconds, he grabbed an old photo of himself and digging out a red sharpie from his desk, crossed his own eyes out. 

Dipper gulped thickly at the sight of it and made quick work. He painted Bill’s symbol across a number of papers he had set on the ground. He placed his picture in the center. 

“What am I forgetting…” Dipper snapped his fingers in realization and making sure no one was dwelling outside, went downstairs and fetched a lighter and the amount of white candles he would need. 

Getting back upstairs without incident, he placed the candles where they needed to be around the circle and lit them, sliding the lighter to the side once he no longer needed it. 

Dipper opened up his journal, sighing through his nose. Gathering up all his courage, he chanted the words needed to summon a single Bill Cipher to him.

Bill popped into life in the center of the circle with a grandiose entrance, topped with his signature laugh. Color drained from the world around Dipper. 

Bill stretched into his limbs, his eye fluttering open. He glanced around, then settled his singular eye on Dipper. 

He laughed louder. “My own little puppet summoning me! And only after a month! You really are inpatient when it comes to me, aren’t you?” 

Dipper ignored Bill’s jabs, staring hard at him. “I need to tell you something,” he said. 

Bill cocked an invisible brow and lowered himself so he was nearly eye and eyes to Dipper. He snickered at Dipper’s serious expression and places his hands on his points. “This should be interesting. Go for it, kid. What do you want?” 

Dipper bit his tongue, glancing around as his nerves bubbled back up. Could he really do this? Could he- he _confess_ himself to Bill Cipher of all people? 

Dipper looked back at Bill, who was now swirling his finger around in the air, a trail of fire following it, completely and utterly bored. 

Dipper gulped. He would have to. He was not dealing with this again. 

“I- I think I’m in love with you.” 

The silence that dropped between the two couldn’t even be cut with a knife. Bill froze completely and he stared at Dipper.

Dipper couldn’t believe the shock in Bill’s expression and yet… yet it was there. Right before him. 

Then, Bill started to laugh. It wasn’t his normal, booming echo that overflowed the room, but instead had a harder, more confounded edge on it. Bill’s laughter resounded with Dipper’s own fraying nerves, matching them evenly. He glanced side to side, rubbing the side of himself. 

“Uh, what?” 

Dipper growled. “I said, I’m in love with you!” 

“O- Oh. You’re… You’re being serious.” 

Dipper glared hard at Bill, forcing the disappointment down. His stomach was churning sickly and he felt as if he were about to vomit. 

“Look, kid. I don’t blame ya for falling in love with me! Really, I don’t! I mean, have you _seen_ me?” Bill struck a pose.

Dipper did not laugh. He merely continued to stare at Bill without blinking. 

Bill dropped his pose. “I’m a demon kid. An immortal demon born before the very fabric of your universe itself. Look, what we got going on is- is fun and all…” Bill pointed between himself and Dipper. He stared hard at Dipper, internally sighing when he saw no tears fall.

Human emotions may have still been a mystery to Bill, but if he knew one thing, it was that if he made Dipper cry, whatever they had going between them would break.

And Bill was not quite ready to give up the taste of sex just yet. 

“-but that’s all it is. Fun. You- you are aware I can’t love, right?”

“You- You can’t?” 

“Not at all. Not one little bit. You loving me? It’s cute! But us together like that ain’t ever gonna happen.” 

“I- I- oh. Oh yeah. Duh. Of- of course not,” Dipper stammered. he looked away, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly. He wished the floor would just open up and eat him already. This was somehow even worse than the time he had confessed to Wendy. 

“Um… well… we can still. You know. Fuck. If you want to,” Bill continued. 

Dipper nodded, a bit too enthusiastically. “Oh yeah! Of course! That- that would be great!” He choked out. 

Bill stared down at Dipper, then glanced around the room. “Well… if that’s all then… later, Pine Tree.” 

“Later,” Dipper echoed, waving his fingers in a pathetic goodbye as Bill disappeared from the world in a flash of blue. Colors bled back into existence. 

Dipper groaned, rubbing a hand across his face and sitting down on the edge of his bed heavily. Though tears pricked his eyes and his heart hurt, his stomach was no longer churning and his hands had stopped shaking. 

He wasn’t so sure what he had been expecting, but Dipper had thought it would’ve been a lot more difficult than that had been… 

Dipper shook his head and slowly climbed up to his feet. Hesitating briefly, he sighed and strode over to the door. 

It was a nice day out. He should see what was going on. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you guys believe I wrote this oh my god. Originally my thoughts were "haha silly me look at this wow" and by chapter six my thoughts were more along the lines of "yikes can I make this worse probably" and now I am here I finished this and I don't even know if it was worth it. 
> 
> Well.... whatever.   
> I just want to say I actually do write and have written other BillDip stories that are actually good?? Not like this at all?? And are taken seriously so if you want something with a lot of plot and character study, I suggest trying out my Once Upon a Time Trilogy (Life is a Fairytale, Limbo is a Legend). 
> 
> Anyways... self-advertising out of the way, I hope you guys liked this?? I guess??? Maybe, probably not? Oh well it's done I no longer have to work on it and I am happy!!
> 
> Thank you for reading all the way up to this point!! Please leave kudos and comments if you haven't already <3


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